white light white heat [entries|friends|calendar] sally [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[25 Jun 2006|05:22pm] theres all this bullshit that seems to be more around now than ever. i dont know, its not my bull shit nor does it really affect me but it is everywhere. and it is hurting the people i love. i have no complaints really, my life is good. i just dont understand why people would rather be full of shit than be real. and all i can think of when i think of that is birth and death. watching my close friend while shes got this baby inside of her is fucking amazing. it cant be more real than that i dont think. she created him inside herself and he is beautiful. and i think she is beautiful and the strongest woman i know. so i watch these kids complain, and cop a field,wank off and i suppose that has its thrills. but in the back of my head, i know there is more to life than all that. i knowwwwwwww. and that keeps me grounded. and i thank god for that conciousness. and i thank him for my peace. these bitches cant break me. on another note, i love my mother because she let me take her to a raw food restaurant and was very openminded through and through. also, i sold my hunter s thompson painting. someone actually wanted one of my pieces. madness and lastly,last night i ate a flower, and i must say that it was the best worst taste ever. especially if its fed to you. white heat

[17 Jun 2006|10:16pm] ive really been thinking about important shit lately, when do i not right? no. the future. i just cant seem to be satisfied. with anything, orange county life love. i know i have so much more to say than what this damn place can offer me which makes me think of sf and how i still dont have the balls to get up and leave. i am running out of time. and in the back of my head i think to myself im never gonna be one of those girls that just sits around and tends to their boyfriend,giggles,looks pretty. IM NEVER GONNA FUCKING BE ONE OF THOSE GIRLS. you all ramble and i ramble on. 1 white light white heat

youth [14 Jun 2006|05:09am] [ mood | FUCKINGinspired ] stop the war this futile fight against our freedom i stand and watch my generation grow into the arms of this demon and i cannot help but wonder where the fuck is all the love we can celebrate we can celebrate our youth we can challenge and fuck the nation with our immortality we are immortal because we are free free to be young free to breathe free to be they do not control our minds power of the soul. power of rock and roll's soul Fuck em with our openmind bullets Shoot em down with our beauty they cannot touch us. not until we ask them to i pledge allegience to MY GENERATION i believe in you, children. i love you, children. lets dance miles around these yuppie bastards Fornicate in the streets Make love to the beats of OUR hearts. our feet shouldnt stop. we do not NEED drugs we need revolution we need kisses and feathers and dandelion blossoms. kites,hope, song. we need growth feed. your. head. child, i love you 2 white light white heat

[07 Jun 2006|05:45am] i wrote it for you. long gone 7th son let me sing you a waltz about a strange man and his unfortunated love he stands on the sand with his gun in his hand and wonders what time she will come a gypsy of fools she convinces with duels and parades on the back of young mules she stares at his eyes both filled with disguise and wonders what makes this man drool the sun slips against her brown skin as she presses her hands to the skys slender skin he stands unashamed gun still embraced,numb from her unspoken grace gypsy woman strides with her love as her pride and says only this to the strangers face: "beauty is free be immortal with me believe in the fire my son" but before he could speak she danced around him 3 and just like that, she was gone now i must end the tall tale of surr- -ender to love and its foes a waltz that we dance to a waltz that we dance to a story of the gypsy on the run and her long gone 7th son white heat

[19 Apr 2006|12:22pm] [ mood | patti-liberated ] i fucking love you patti smith. you are so fucking empowering. empowering and so fucking beautiful.. "We believe in the total freedom of communication and we will not be compromised. The censorship of words is as meaningless as the censorship of musical notes; we cannot tolerate either. Freedom means exactly that: no limits, no boundaries...rock and roll is not a colonial power to be exploited, told what to say and how to say it. This is the spirit in which our music began and the flame in which is must be continued. Radio Ethiopia is a symphony of experience...each piece a movement...14 movements...14 stations." There is silence on my radio... --Stones white heat

[17 Apr 2006|12:26pm] something in me has finally clicked. click. i dunno, positive inertia..internal potential whatever you wanna call it..and i feel blessed truly. ive been thinking about school alot lately. just realizing that all my activism, 'the-world-is-so-fucked-up' ideals can only really be in effect through freaking art school. which brings me to, ive been painting more lately. i suppose its strange to not really have control over creative urges but i think thats what makes them more true. right? i guess i gotta right a speech for graduation too. my principal wants me to speak to my graduation class. me hahaha ..ive never been too good at being full of shit. on another note, its jennas birthday next week, and i was hoping that my painting for her would be ready for her birthday. but im a procrastinating floosie and it has quite a ways to go. i love her though, her and her Long Beach. i cant believe i can say that now um im reading this book about mysticism and it is really pressing all the points ive been pressuring lately. i hope the rest of this damn social scene will soon see this immortal beauty that i so mad-ramblingly speak of. (i refuse to believe he loves her) 'Nomadic love is a vagabond it is a hot air balloon going towards the horizon Bohemian love doesnt care about the depths of these imponderables Disillusions Deceived.' oh yeah, and jessica left for the navy. goodbye fucking sailor! 3 white light white heat

[04 Apr 2006|09:36am] dear lovely, i cannot help but be confused as to why you are with her. know that it is not because i am jealous or in any sense envious of what she has because there is a beauty in you that i believe everyone should have the right to see. but i do doubt with all of my being that she could never ever see what i see in you. it is strange. i wish i could tell you how i feel, but you will never truly know. because in all honesty, the sensation is far too much greater than you and me. your ambience is so overwhelming that i must resort to vanity everytime im around you. i do not ask the gods to ever let me be with you. i do not know if i could ever handle that. just know, that everytime i see something immortal it makes me feel you. love sally white heat

[29 Mar 2006|10:55am] i got the scholarship. hah, i guess i should stop doubting myself now 2 white light white heat

[17 Mar 2006|09:37am] HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME. im going to be with all my beautiful friends tonight. call my cell phone if you wanna celebrate me To Love and War. 1 white light white heat

[24 Feb 2006|09:40am] i dont know. jessica is still not talking to me. not having her in my life right now makes me feel like im lacking something. i dont give a fuck if she doesnt care anymore though. cause were the fucking sailors! or so i thought. besides that pasttimes have been fun..pirates day and all..foam diving. but i have this ongoing battle between my heart and my mind. i know what i gotta do but i also have these sudden urges. i dont wanna be like these kids and be satisfied with damn orange county. god thats scary. i wanna get outta here. i hope i get into calarts if anything. i guess i really do want to go to art school more than anything. more than all the drinking, the drugs, my mother. i need to stop living my life for her. i love her. i love her so much...but fucksdaiotera i cant take her emotional baggage anymore. venting over angry samoans/ smutt peddlers are playing tonight. i hope i can go and kick the shit outta something 3 white light white heat

[14 Feb 2006|12:39pm] Do you cry out in your sleep All my failings expose? Get a taste in my mouth As desperation takes hold Is it something so good Just can’t function no more? When love, love will tear us apart again i hope to get wasted tonight. my love affair with merlot (je veux entrer dans toi) 6 white light white heat

[03 Feb 2006|10:14am] Exploding Hearts side band is playing at the knitting factory on saturday.!!!lets go dancing. oh yeah, and KEEP YOUR FUCKING DRUGS AWAY FROM MY FRIENDS! merci 3 white light white heat

[31 Jan 2006|09:45am] ok. so soooooooo i, sally boozar am a dramatic, neurotic gookbag. and i really am saying all this so that i can grow some balls and make some decisions. all this talk about future. jennas going to oregon, my best fucking friend is moving to oregon..jess is sailing off into the navy the good ol n-a-v-y. and then theres me, hopeful for art school but scared shitless of change. and i wanna tell him how i feel, how beautiful i think his tragedy is. and how he isnt really a tragedy, and thatt thats ok too. because hes still beautiful. and that we cant drink at the train tracks anymore. yeah well everythings gonna work out like they do in the movies. yeah hows that you say? BAM BAM I can’t see much of a future unless we find out what’s to blame. What a shame And we won’t be together much longer unless we realize that we are the same. Ever fallen in love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone You shouldn’t’ve fallen in love with 5 white light white heat

[27 Jan 2006|10:02am] wow im so overwhelmed with everything happening goddamnit. i gotta get this stuff in for the merit scholarship by the 15th and i havent taken my slide shots yet. i hope my essay skills click into gear sometime soon because i wanna blow these admissions people away. i really fucking want this. even if that means having to move to san francisco. gabba gabba gabba 6 white light white heat

[11 Jan 2006|09:50am] 10 more days til portfolio day in san diego. im so anxious its as if i can feel my heart in my hands. quite a terrible feeling really. (vinyl helps me.) the music of the dependable RECORD PLAYER. i put the needle onto the phonograph, making sure it smoothly caresses the vinyl. the fuzziness starts to crackle beautifully, the vocals start but i do not worry for the climax of the song will be along shortly. i like that part especially and the abrupt manner in which it throws itself forward, like a cliff against the sea. for the moment, the music is playing..there is no melody..only notes, a myriad of tiny jolts. they know no rest, an inflexible order gives birth to them and DESTROYS themselves. they race, they press forward they strike me a sharp blow in passing and are obliterated. i would like to hold them back but i know if i succeeded in stopping one it would remain in between my fingers only as a raffish languishing sound. i must accept their death..i must even will it.....i know few impressions stronger. i grow warm. i begin to feel happy. there is nothing extraordinary in this it is a small happiness of nasuea. it spreads at the bottom of the viscous puddle at the bottom of OUR time, the time of purple suspenders and broken chair seats. it is made of wide soft instants spreading at the edge like an oil stain.no sooner than born it is already old.. it seems as though i have known for twenty years The Briefs are playing on saturday. yeehaw 1 white light white heat

[12 Dec 2005|09:37am] man, so i wanna get some of my artwork on here but i dont know how to use the damn scanner...jenna says i gotta get as much exposure as possible..bleh i dont know what im scared of people are so funny...this whole scene down here is lame. honestly, when will these damn hb kids learn to be real. ive decided that i like long beach alot more. theres more vulnerability, dirt. anyway, THE STARVATIONS are playing with the stitches on thursday at the galaxy. its their last show and its going to be fuckin amazing.. aklhwreoitha!!! i love mr. mojo 3 white light white heat

bowie pop reed [06 Dec 2005|10:08am] hes got luckies in his mouth...greatest fuckin picture white heat

[05 Dec 2005|09:43am] EAGLES OF DEATH METAL are playing at the troubadour on the 21st! hell fucking yesssssss 2 white light white heat

[02 Dec 2005|09:52am] im applying to art schools and i guess its making me nervous. portfolio day is on january 22. san francisco art institutes gonna be there..fucking a. i hope my hands will make some magic. jennas moving out of tylers house on saturday and im helping her move. i cant help but feel a bit sad that its gonna be different now. i mean uh...what do those kids say...'its chill. its chill. pft hipsters in other news, im gonna try and sing at open mic night at the gypsey den, im so bored with people who lie and say they dont do drugs, and i have a feeling its going to rain today. The wind is telling me So. 5 white light white heat

[21 Nov 2005|09:36am] 'Look at me, I love T-Rex so effin much but i dont know shit about the band, just that one song you know,20th century..um something. Yeah, Im so hip with my nonchalant- fake appeal, and my million dollar boots boots.' dude, FUCK OFF white heat

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